The Bachelor Season 24, episode 9 spoiled recap: Intimacy issues

ABC/John Fleenor
ABC/John Fleenor /
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ABC/Maarten de Boer
ABC/Maarten de Boer /

Madi’s FSD

Madi and Peter go on their fantasy suite date where they…scale a building? Macho Pete notably allowed Madison to test the harnesses first as she led the way up this anti-fantasy date. They seem to have great chemistry, and Peter is clearly very into her. With all the forehead touching, they give off a strong middle school vibe, but it’s cute. What on earth was that tragic scrapbook? We were expecting the Titanic soundtrack to serve as the score.

Back at the hotel, Hannah Ann relays Madi’s reservations to Victoria, who seems appalled? Look, we don’t like the ultimatum either but it’s a bit rich to act like Madi is a manipulative person given the events of your hometown, kind ma’am.

Next comes the moment the show has been hoping for since casting Madison: the dinner portion of her fantasy suite.

As expected, their conversation veers into a continuation of the fully resolved, no-stone-left-unturned conversation they had on the hangar. Reddit did the lord’s work per usual and transcribed their conversation so you’re spared from replaying this sad, handwritten book, but here’s essentially what went down:

Peter starts by noting that this week has weighed on him heavily due to their last conversation together, specifically, his intimacy with the other women. He does take care to note, “[I’ve] been torn because, the fact of the matter is, I do have two other relationships right now.”

Madison expresses she felt “really discouraged and disappointed” after their hangar chat, as she doesn’t want to serve him an ultimatum. That said, telling someone they can’t be intimate with your sister wives or else you’re out is not only an ultimatum, but one that wasn’t made remotely made clear before right now. If you recall, he specifically asked her what exactly she was asking of him that prior week, and she did not provide #clarity on how important it clearly was to her.

None of this is to say we don’t have understanding of Madi’s position in all of this. It’s easy to sit at home and Monday morning quarterback the situation, but we know it’s a lot to expect someone to be comfortable divulging their sexual history and to do so in a way that the audience sees fit.

Would it have been better to have had this conversation earlier? Of course. Their second one-on-one comes to mind as an opportune time to share her expectations in terms of sex and intimacy. However, we understand her hesitation and fear of sharing something so personal on national television.

That being said, it’s naïve to come on a show like The Bachelor with a structured formula leading to exactly this scenario, piloted by a man whose whole personality is literally sex times four.

Madison finally tells Peter her convictions and that she is saving herself for marriage. Peter honestly seems like he is on the verge of tears when he says that he respects the hell out of her for making that decision, but that it is not a conviction he shares.

Let’s be clear: while we support Madison’s decision to wait until marriage, and have nothing against her as a person, this is was indeed an ultimatum. To quote Lauren Zima, an ultimatum is not inherently negative.

We feel for Madi in this situation, because it is undoubtedly a tough one to be in, and it’s certainly not normal for your fiancé to sleep with someone else less than a week before proposing to you – but this show isn’t normal (nor has it ever pretended to be). Madi had no reason to think Peter would be celibate – again, he’s the Bachelor windmill guy who keeps condoms in the center console of his Mercedes.

Essentially, she was asking that he pick her before the fantasy suites even began. While some leads definitely do know who they’re choosing by this stage, we honestly don’t think Peter knew who his F1 was at this point, and it’s unfair to ask him to make that decision two weeks early. Many leads – including Hannah! – have said that their decision was impacted by fantasy suites, and it is an important time to talk to each other off-camera.

As we said earlier, it’s not at all surprising that she tried to avoid this conversation for as long as possible, it’s just not fair to Peter or the ~process~ to wait so long to bring it up.

The other obvious issue is that, as far as we know, Peter does not have an Australian time machine, and as such, he can quite literally do nothing to resolve this. We also didn’t like the way that she framed this conversation by noting she’s already sacrificed so much throughout the show because he’s kissing others, etc. That is what this show is!! It’s unfair to act like Peter is violating all your convictions by continuing to participate in the show that has had the same formula for 24 seasons.

Look, Madi is great and seems like a lovely person, but we’re confused as to why she signed up for a show like The Bachelor – and for Peter’s season no less! Maybe this would have gone better for her on a Sean Lowe season or even with Ben Higgins, but alas.

This is obviously a tough conversation for them both, and Peter eventually admits that he was intimate that week. Madi excuses herself. Of note, Madi’s ITM where she is discussing their dinner is very articulate and mature. We really feel for her because it’s obviously really weighing on her, and she shouldn’t have to compromise what she believes in for a man.

We don’t doubt that these two really do have feelings for each other, but they are inherently incompatible when it comes to faith, which Madi has said multiple times is one of the most important aspects of her life. Neither should be put in this position, but they both handled it as best they could.

Peter comforts Madi outside and asks her to please not give up on their relationship. Will this be a wake-up call like Cassie leaving was for Colton, where Madi is solidified as F1, or will this drive them apart? TRULY NO ONE KNOWS.

Madi walks away, and we’re left alone with our thoughts. Just like Peter. See ya next week folks, where we’ll get zero answers with this season’s Bachelor Women Tell All episode!

The Bachelor season 24, episode 9 power rankings. dark. Next

Did you think…ultimately…that Madi gave Peter an ultimatum? Did this episode of The Bachelor spell out Madi as F1 or Madi on the next flight? Let us know your thoughts and theories! Xoxo.