Group date: Bachiron gang
On the group date, the 13 girls visit the Cleveland Browns. Is this supposed to be foreshadowing for a losing season or…?
We’re losing it at Peter’s enthusiasm entering the stadium. To be fair, the Browns put up 40 points against Baltimore that week so maybe Peter was feeling optimistic. Peter makes a couple of missteps right off the bat. First, he introduces Hanford Dixon as holding the NFL record for most return touchdowns, which is incorrect (it’s Devin Hester), and calls Josh Cribbs, whom we have never heard of, a legend. For reference next time Peter:
Peter also alerts the women that they’re in “good hands” today. Peter, Baker Mayfield works with Progressive, please get it together.
This was a sufficiently entertaining date to watch. Mykenna thought she was catching a beach ball instead of a football with that grip, Deandra is currently fielding calls from the Browns’ front office, and Victoria P. starts to become a sad, handwritten book with her back ailments.
Victoria P. embodies the notion work smarter, not harder. She gets a mini one-on-one and a creepy back massage out of it: the real prize. Peter, continuing to exhibit zero self-awareness, carries this out approximately 20 ft from the field.
TOD: Chris Harrison ghosting the Bachelor Bowl 2019. We get a classic ‘win or ride home in sweaty shoulder pads while the winners hang out with Peter and sip some bubbly’ date – bring it on.
Peter is 100% going to be a raging soccer mom when he has kids. Several points for the enthusiastic sideline sprints. Strong Beast Quake flashbacks with the Deandra TD that we would like to return. Shiann, Kelley and Deandra make a strong case for the 2020 draft and the game ends in a tie. No one is happy.
It was very genuine and real.
Alright, ladies, you were in Cleveland, not a gladiator arena. You will all be fine. Likely, the girls were more so tired and cold than anything else, but the irritation was palpable. Kudos again to the sound editors for the horror soundtrack as *footsteps approach*.
Alayah returns to The Bachelor and the ladies are shooketh. Alayah expresses to Peter that she felt blindsided and unable to articulate herself the week prior, to which Peter expresses regret. In all fairness, Peter is clearly way over his head in lady drama and didn’t really seem too sure of his decisions last week so this was likely the right move. However, he could’ve refrained from…doing the most by giving her the group date rose.
On the group date, Alayah outs herself as a spoiler-obsessed internet sleuth (same) and gives the girls all the gossip she has learned since leaving the show. She tells them Victoria F. dated Chase Rice.