The Bachelorette Season 16, Week 3: Checking Up on Clare
The Bachelorette Season 16, Week 3 shows us how resilient Clare really is.
The Bachelorette Season 16, Week 3 showed us where Clare’s head and heart are at and it’s time to check in on her! There have been overarching themes to Clare’s plan of attack each week, especially when it comes to caring for herself and her needs. This column will be a weekly update on her journey to love, but it will also serve as an update on her journey coping with her past experiences and the overarching themes she focuses on during that week.
**Please be advised that we will be discussing elements linked to Clare’s conversations during the weekly episodes which may contain topics pertaining to emotional and domestic abuse.
The Bachelorette Season 16, Week 3: Bye, Yosef
Last week when we checked in on Clare, she was making peace with herself as she coped with the emotional abuse of her past. This week held similar themes, but with much stronger reactions that were a testament to who Clare is and what she wants.
The first explosion of the week involved Yosef complaining about the strip dodgeball game that he was not even part of. At the beginning of the episode, he pulls Clare aside to speak to her about his disapproval of the group date from last week. He claimed that he was embarrassed and would never want to set an example like that for his daughter, and continued to attack Clare for choosing the date in question.
Regardless of whether or not the strip dodgeball date was ethical, Yosef’s approach was rooted in violence. He continued to interrupt Clare, asserting his dominance in the situation and escalating to a dangerous point. Clare barely even said anything, listening to his reasoning and trying to make peace with what he was saying. She even added a comment about her sick mother at one point, which he also interrupted. Yosef clearly had no respect for her and was not willing to compromise on whatever hidden issue was actually guiding his actions.
Yosef was thankfully sent home for his behavior, but these actions shook Clare up and she canceled the remainder of the cocktail party. This week she fully stood her ground, standing up for herself and her choices, but more importantly: she told Yosef that his actions were unacceptable. She followed this incident by taking care of herself and doing what she needed to calm down after being triggered and further experiencing trauma from the past as well.
The Bachelorette Season 16, Week 3: The Zach-ward situation
Clare has been so poised and intelligent about what she needs and knows full well what she cannot handle. This came into play once more on her one on one date with Zach J. During their time relaxing in the pool, Clare leaned in for a kiss, while he pulled away, a reaction that she was not expecting. To make up for his mistake, Zach followed her towards her room, putting his unwelcome hand on her neck. This triggered an upsetting reaction from Clare who was understandably startled by Zach’s actions.
The night did end with Clare sending Chris Harrison to the dinner portion of the date to send Zach home, which I commend her for incredibly.
Though there has been great debate over Clare’s outward affections and favoritism towards Dale, I think it makes a lot of sense and is coming as a reaction from a place of lived experience. Dale has gone out of his way to comfort Clare and his mutual affections towards her clearly give her the acceptance she has been looking for.
When experiencing so much rejection and mistreatment, it only makes sense that if the person she is most attracted to feels the same way about her, Clare is going to latch onto him. And I don’t think this is a bad thing. Though it may be disappointing from other men, and we have no idea where their relationship will go from here, Clare has been through a lot and it’s only fair to allow for her to do what she needs for herself. This season is, after all, about her finding love. And maybe she has!
If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic abuse, contact The National Domestic Violence Hotline by calling 1-800-799-7233 or by visiting their website for more information.
Clare is the hero she always needed, and she gave herself the rose this week to prove it.
What did you think of Clare’s week of dates on The Bachelorette Season 16? Did you enjoy getting to see her go for what she wants? Tune in to ABC on Thursday, Nov. 5 at 8/7c to follow the rest of Clare’s journey!